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I think I'm pretty,

Don’t even think that.

 

 

I think I'm thin,

But you’re actually fat.



I think my friends
like me

No they don’t, they loathe you.



If fact, no one likes you!

You’re stupid,

You’re worthless,

You’re pathetic.

A freak!


Why are you so mean
to me?

To you!?

I AM YOU!



I am the voice,

Inside your head,

That makes you scream.


I am the monster,

That crawls into your heart,

And gnaws on it,

Until you bleed.

Until you cut.

Until you swallow

The internals of your poisons,

Tiny pill by tiny pill.

 

 

Until you fall asleep,

But never wake up.

Then I am finally silent.



But yet you’ve ignore me.

I have?

 

 

Sometimes you have.

Some days you go on,

Like I am never the bit of fragment

Of the sick twisted imagination

You have against yourself.



And you're happy,
That you try to live,

In a fantasy world

Where I don't exist.


And for the other
times?

For the other days,

                                                                                                                     I  control you.                              

What you do,

What you say,

And how you feel about yourself.

 

These days you’re my slave.

I make you feel helpless,

Worthless,

         Guilty,   

Hopeless,

      Disgusting,

A burden to society.

You think that you’ll be better.

But you never will.

 

 

Yes I will.

I’ve never wanted you
in life.

You are nothing but a
parasite.

Leeching into my
thoughts,

                              Leeching into my life,                                 

Like I am nothing,

But a source of life
for you.


You need me,

More than I need you.

 

 

You are the devil
inside me,

But I have no
sympathy for you

And the wicked game,

You make me play
against myself,

For your sick
entertainment.

 

You may be a demon
that rots inside of me,

But I pick the angel
of hope.

Who will guide me,

To something better,

Something that I
deserve,

Something more than you
made me endure.

Something more
meaningful than you.

 

 

I don’t need you
anymore.

 

 

What are you doing?!


Something I should
have done a long time ago.



To be honest, I had no idea what to name this. It's a diolouge poem form in between a girl and the thoughts in her head that make hate herself, but she starts to stand for herself against the monster inside her (her negative thoughts). This poem is for the people who feel like they are their own worst enemy. There is hope.

EDIT: A big thanks goes to ~Zandoom for telling me about the spelling error.
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:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you
Reply
:iconkayleeklink:
kayleeklink Featured By Owner May 15, 2013
I Like it
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner May 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you
Reply
:iconfirstlynx:
FirstLynx Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013
wow, amazing! I'll take this as my guideline :D
Reply
:iconartyswiftfox:
ArtySwiftFox Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2012
This is beautiful
Reply
:iconcrumbledwings:
CrumbledWings Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2012
Holy shit, i loveee it especially the ending, the recognition of her own demons and having the stregnth to remove them. I wish i had written it but i know i would have just ruined it becuase i could have never written it as beautifully hopeful as this.
Reply
:iconsmoleyface:
SmoleyFace Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
You made my life.
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you :hug:
Reply
:iconumbracrux:
UmbraCrux Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
This is so deep, and it is very nearly true to myself...
Reply
:iconktkeiper:
ktkeiper Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I haven't gotten to the second half yet... Maybe I'll be there someday...
Reply
:iconcobainlives:
CobainLives Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I didn't want this to end! But the end was beautiful, so I got over that rather quickly. This was so spectacular... very nice work!! :)
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you
Reply
:iconartyswiftfox:
ArtySwiftFox Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
Loved it!
Reply
:icondramaticdiva:
DramaticDiva Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist
wow.......
i can honestly say i am speechless!
Reply
:iconauspisticize:
Auspisticize Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
very beatiful almost made me cry T-T
Reply
:iconthemulatto:
TheMulatto Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
I've kind've just embarrassed those thoughts and used them as fueled and started not the really give any. I took the pain and let myself be scarred just so I can come back stronger and better. I think I came out better for it but we all deal with those nagging thoughts in our own way.
Reply
:iconxpandakirax:
xPandaKirax Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist
Wow. This is beautiful. Thank you.
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
you're welcome
Reply
:iconimmortal-rin:
Immortal-Rin Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
You have no idea how much this brightened my day.
It just... thank you.
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
you're welcome :hug:
Reply
:iconeleangelofmusic:
EleAngelOfMusic Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
u know i never ever read any of these "texts" on deviant,but when i saw the title,it caught me and ive start reading,sometimes i also have these crazy and worst thoughts which i create by myself,but fortunately it happens rare :D so what i want to say,yep,this is amazing,great, gorgeous !! u r very talanted,keep it up^^ im watching u :D:D:D
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconeweplz: our comment made my day
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
*your
Reply
:iconkurodaia-chan:
Kurodaia-Chan Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Student Digital Artist
This is so awesome! ;a; this reminds me of how i am with my inner-self.
Reply
:iconpollyzoom:
pollyzoom Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
this poem discribes me so much its not even funny and that its about time that someone sees what life can do to people very nicely done
Reply
:iconam-amnion-pm:
AM-Amnion-PM Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Wow! This writing really blew me away~
Excellent job!<3 ;o;
Reply
:iconbritlawrence:
BritLawrence Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
you are an amazing writer (:
Reply
:iconskayres:
Skayres Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for this :thanks:
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
your welcome
Reply
:iconcrazygirl9913:
CrazyGirl9913 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
My inner doubts just shrank a bit.
Thank you for that.
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
you're welcome
Reply
:iconafbook7exists:
AFbook7exists Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
The line: "But I pick the angel of hope." Reminds me of the short stories "Bridges" and "Small Deaths" by Charles de Lint. Maybe you'd like them. Lovely poem, by the way. Very thoughtful, very genuine.
Reply
:iconraylia:
raylia Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you.
Reply
:iconsakyodawnii:
SakyoDawnii Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I relate to this 100%.
The inner "demon" inside me is taking me over now, to the point where I cannot stand myself anymore. I've become my own enemy.
This is lovely and personal, in my opinion. <3
Reply
:iconthemeepynerd:
themeepynerd Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
This is absolutely terrific! Wow...this really made me think! I love it so much!
Reply
:iconsolyme:
Solyme Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
Nicely written. I love how you made it a dialogue, and even more that you made clear that at first, the girl doesn't know that it's her own inner "devil" that is bringing herself down. Just like some girls that go through this awful stage in their life often think they're rationally observing themselves/their friends.

I also think you were right in making the girl stand for herself so fast - some girls, sometimes, choose to feed that devil part and forget about that. This piece calls for action, fast and neat, for there probably is no other way to do it right and somewhat painlessly.

Punctuation is also clever - at first, it's like all of her thoughts are incomplete, while at the end, they are statements, strong, deliberate. My only complaint would be about the lack of punctuation after the "But I have no sympathy for you" - I understand you broke the sentence and that actual punctuation wouldn't be needed, but somehow, it breaks a bit the visual effet.

However, this is a very nice piece - and a lot of girls and women should probably read it, and hopefully see their own demon out from their minds.
Reply
:iconskyrore1999:
skyrore1999 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
amazing
Reply
:iconguitargirl99f:
GuitarGirl99f Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This is AMAZING.
Reply
:icondarvia123:
Darvia123 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Amazing! I absoluty love it!
Reply
:iconsurinn:
Surinn Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
you are really good at making poemtry!!! I admit you <3 <3 <3 <3
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconolivia-holmes:
Olivia-Holmes Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Stunning. The form is excellent.
Reply
:iconsolie-solie:
solie-solie Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you very much for this :')
Reply
:icondreamcatcher5674:
dreamcatcher5674 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is beautifully written
Reply
:iconnodokasfangirl:
nodokasfangirl Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Purely beautiful and well written; I'm sure many of us can relate to the internal struggle.
Reply
:iconalbinoukelele:
AlbinoUkelele Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This was wonderful and very reassuring :) thank you
Reply
:iconzandoom:
Zandoom Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
naws is supposed to be spelt "gnaws".
anyway, beautiful poem, I feel like that sometimes.
Reply
:icongoddessofthearts:
goddessofthearts Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you. i'm actually a bad speller, i'll edit that
Reply
:iconzandoom:
Zandoom Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Ah it's fine,I'm a bad speller too :)
Reply
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